I am now emotionally scarred.
THOSE OF YOU WHO ATTEND THE AS-YET-UNDISCLOSED-BY-NAME-YET-TERRIBLY-EVIDENT-BY-INNUENDO COLLEGE THAT I WORK FOR...do NOT eat the Cool Ranch Doritos (TM) in the Kava House. They have no flavor. Two people -- plus me -- have all opened separate bags, and have been psychologically damaged by the absence of Cool Ranchy goodness. These are, simply, naked and flavorless corn chips.
Sweet Canadian Mullets...what the heck will happen next?!?